Tuesday, July 15, 2008

Boiling Over.

I wrote Brett Favre a tongue-in-cheek letter about a week ago, believing that he wasn't serious about coming back and was just looking for someone to stroke his massive ego. Since then, Favre has publicly demanded that he be released from his contract, taken shots at Ted Thompson and Mike McCarthy in the media, and, perhaps most bizarrely of all, given an interview to Greta van Susteren on Fox News.

Let me make clear, at the beginning, that I'm only speaking for myself here -- not for anyone at the Buffet or Mrs. Q or my mother. Others will have different opinions, and those opinions are valid. But I'm at my wits end with this hick.

Every time Brett Favre opens his mouth now, I hear the same thing, over and over and over: "Me. Me. Me me me. Meeeeeeeeeeee." Alright, Brett. You want to talk about you? Let's have at it.

You are a 14-year-old girl.

You say you don't feel "wanted" in Green Bay anymore. You say that you were "pressured" into deciding whether to retire. You say that, when you retired, you knew it was "possible" that the Packers would move on...

(I'm sorry, I can't let that last one go without a comment. Of course it was fucking "possible" that the organization would move on when its starting fucking quarterback retired. What the fuck did you expect them to do? Sit quietly, maybe write you some letters telling you how much they missed you, pine for you during training camp, and then, when the season started and they realized, "Holy shit, Brett isn't coming back!", throw a wide receiver out there to take the snaps? My God. How full of yourself do you have to be to say that you thought it "possible" that the team would go in a different direction after you quit playing?)

Here's what I know about you, Brett. Your play, in the last few seasons (save for last season, of course), was borderline terrible. You were an average quarterback, at best, but because you're Brett Favre, nobody talked about it. No, we heard about you needing "more weapons." Give Brett more weapons, and he'll get it done, we were told. Nobody mentioned the fact that you hadn't carried this team for a few years; that Ahman Green was doing the heavy lifting, carrying the ball so often that, eventually, a tendon in his leg ended up snapping like a rubber band; that the offensive line was probably the best in football for a good three years; and that, when the line lost a couple of pieces, and when Ahman went down, you didn't do -- you couldn't do -- jack shit to save the season. Instead, you winged nearly 30 interceptions, shrugged, and said: "We did the best we could, be we just don't have the horses."

I also know that you're one of the most uncoachable players in the league. Holmgren essentially had to put a shock collar on you to get you to throw a ball out of bounds when the play broke down and no one was open. You're the primary reason Ray Rhodes only lasted a year in Green Bay. And Sherman is maligned for having good teams that never reached their potential, when you kept those teams from doing all they could because of your wildly inconsistent and reckless play. McCarthy actually had the stones to stand up to you, to make you follow a game plan, and look what happened -- we won big. And what does he get for his efforts? He gets branded (along with Thompson) as the guy who ran Brett out of town when Brett still wanted to play. In the ultimate irony, he gets called selfish for moving on with Aaron Rodgers when you quit and then said you wanted to come back.

And here's the last thing I know about you, Brett: you're not worth it. As much as you want to believe Brett Favre is the Green Bay Packers, and as much as we've been told that Brett Favre is the Green Bay Packers, it's just not true. This team existed long before you and will exist long after you. Thank God that Ted Thompson has the foresight to plan for that. Unfortunately, just like McCarthy, he gets called selfish for doing so. But here's the thing -- those same people who are clamoring for your return are the same people who will taking to the streets with pitchforks and torches if Thompson mortgages the future for you and the team goes 7-9 in the first year after you actually retire.

The only point where I have any sympathy for you is here: you are clearly a depressed man. God willing, you'll live for another forty years. And you've got nothing at all to do. That must be a sobering realization.

Where I don't have sympathy for you is here: you are clearly a deluded man. Somewhere along the line, you came to believe that you're bigger than the game, more important than anyone else on the team -- that you're owed something. None of us is owed anything, Brett. And, more importantly, bitching and complaining about how you're owed something will never convince anyone that you're right.


Softball's Tony Gwynn said...

Wonderfully put Rubie...couldn't have said it better myself.

As Sheet's Va Jay Jay said yesterday...I might now even care about football this year.

Time to move on!!!!

Devil's Threesome said...

Co-sign. Go...the...fuck...away...Brett Favre. Just go away. Forever.

Rubie Q said...

One thing I forgot to include: during Favre's interview, he said something along the lines of: "McCarthy even said that he knew I was going to have second thoughts and would probably think about coming back."

This, I believe, is a variation on the "she was asking for it" defense.

Reid You Animal! said...

Awesome rant dude, and I couldn't agree more. Nobody seems to remember how many things went right for the Packers last year. We had a considerable amount of luck go in our favor. (See KC, Denver, and Philly games for starters.) Having Favre is NO guarantee of anything.

As I've said, let him go have his "Namath on the Rams" moment that no one will remember ten years from now. See how the fans in Tampa react when you throw 3 INTs, including one in the final minute while driving for at least a tying FG. OH, and congratulations on doing the one thing no one ever thought possible, turning Packer fans against Brett Favre.