Thursday, December 11, 2008

Today's Episode of WSSP Uninformed Buffoonery.

Happened to be in the car today during the first segment of something called "The Big Show" on 'SSP, which, as best I could tell, features:
  • The One With the Closed-Head Injury (Gary Ellerson)
  • The One Who Insists on Being Called Sparky Despite the Fact That He's a 40-Year-Old Man (Sparky), and ...
  • The Other One, who may or may not be named Josh.
Anyway, I got treated to these cringe-inducing moments in the first five minutes of the show (Batman-style sound effects mine):
  • The Other One saying, more than once, that they'd be taking calls regarding "the CC Sabathia trade." BIFF!
  • The One With the Closed-Head Injury being let out of the crawl space to talk about the Brewers starting rotation, and, at one point, mumbling: "Well, you've got Gallardo, Bush, and Suppan ... and ... um, who are the other two?" Followed by Sparky saying: "Gallardo and Parra." And The Oft-Concussed One responding: "Oh, right. Gallardo and Parra." BLUNDER! (Hey, we might've had a tough off-season, but at least we've managed to clone Gallardo!)
  • The One Who Insists on Being Called Sparky ranting about how he was "lied to" and told by Brewers management that the team was going to be a perennial contender ala the Twins and A's ... but then explaining that he felt "lied to" because the Brewers weren't able to sign one of their own high-priced free agents, and thus weren't serious about being a perennial contender -- and all the while never realizing that the Twins and A's don't sign their free agent players to big contracts. WHIFF!
Wow. It was an impressive four minutes of radio.

10 comments:

Devil's Threesome said...

I really wish I could walk into the WSSP studios and just start throwing some fucking haymakers. The level of stupidity is fucking incomprehensible. My old boss said it best. "So, what's the deal with WSSP? The dudes on there were complaining about the Wisconsin Marquette game and saying that "we" got robbed by the refs. How could "they" get robbed by the refs? The Milwaukee team won!!"
Water head retards - all of them!!
WSSP is what happens when you have a bunch of 25 year old spazzes running a radio station. They are like Mike and Mike, but without the gayness, lame ass fucking shit promos and endless motherfucking commercials. I hate them with the power of 1,000 BHo-Todd Townsend BJ's.
Somebody get me a drink - FUCK!!!

EMoney said...

"WHAT'S CRACKIIIIIIIIIN MILWAUKEEEEE!"

"BOOOOOOOOMMMMMMMMMM!!!!"

"Another win for the Badgers!"

"BOOOOOOOOMMMMMMMMMM!!!!"

Gary's Picks:

Cliff: "Alright Gary, what's your prediction on tonight's matchup at the Bradley Center between Texas Southern and Marquette?"
Gary: "Texas Southern is playing well and coming off of a strong performance over West Central Texas U. I'm going with Texas Southern. Booommmmm!"
Cliff: "Shocking! Ok. What about the Wisconsin Badgers versus the 2001 LA Lakers?"
Gary: "Where's the game at?"
Cliff: "Does it really matter?"
Gary: "Nope. The Badgers will emerge victorious! Booommmmmm!"

Rubie Q said...

Speaking of Cliff -- I didn't hear his voice yesterday. Did he have the day off, or has 'SSP sent him to live with a nice farm family upstate?

Zone Defense is for Pussies said...

Cliff was replaced with sparky and Josh (who used to do sports updates during commercials). cliff was demoted to the be the solo host of a mid-day but has since been replaced with Dan Patrick.

Rubie Q said...

Sounds like someone is a member of the WSSP Fan Club!

Zone Defense is for Pussies said...

so I get emails from them big fucking deal...don't you ever, ever fucking call me a fan of that shitty radio station you fuckity fuck!

Rubie Q said...

Sounds like someone attended Rubie Q's weekend seminar on "How to Incorporate the Fucking F-Bomb Into Your Fucking Comments At an Alarmingly High Rate."

Zone Defense is for Pussies said...

Imitation is the sincerest form of flattery -

To imitate someone is to pay the person a genuine compliment—often an unintended compliment. 1


The New Dictionary of Cultural Literacy, Third Edition. Edited by E.D. Hirsch, Jr., Joseph F. Kett, and James Trefil. Copyright © 2002 by Houghton Mifflin Company. Published by Houghton Mifflin Company. All rights reserved.

Devil's Threesome said...

Zone - who the fuck is that in your motherfucking picture you fucking gayrod motherfucking fucker.

"Uhh, I'm gonna have to go with the Badgers on this one, Cliff!"

"What's the deal with the music guy at Miller Park always playing "Hava Negela?" (phonetic spelling)

"Hey Mike, what are you and "Katie" doing tonight? Will she let you out of the house and have fun with the guys?"
"You know what, Doug, I'm really tired of pretending like I have a girlfriend to maintain this cliched banter. I'm actually a flaming gay Michigan fan who buttplugs Sparky during every commercial break. I only moved to MKE to better stalk JJ Hardy. He has resisted my advances thus far, but once this flavor saver comes in, he'll be all over me. Ok, I need to leave to go find a trendy hat like JJ and Ryan Braun wear."

Zone Defense is for Pussies said...

the lord of the zone defense: Jim Boeheim and his bitch punching Syracuse Orange.