Tony Gwynn, Jr. -- placed on outright waivers.
Somebody -- ANYBODY -- please claim him. I think the Padres are required to by the league charter.
Oh, what a wonderful world it will be! No more standing ovations when TGJ is summoned to pinch hit (and then promptly strikes out). No more idiot fans arguing that TGJ needs to play more because he's an ideal lead off hitter (career OBP: .300. THREE-GODDAMN-HUNDRED!). It's over. Sweet merciful Jesus, it's over.
[UPDATE: I spoke too soon. According to Haudricourt's blog, not a single frackin' team claimed TGJ off waivers. Not one team. That fact, alone, should end all the debate regarding the relative merits of Tony Gwynn, Jr. I know it won't, but it should.]