Tuesday, August 25, 2009

D3's Uneducated College Football Ruminations

With the moving and nupitals I haven't had much time to fully delve into my life's true passion, college football research. I'll get some more content up over the next week, but here are some early, very uneducated thoughts on the upcoming season.

Many college football pundits will tell you that Ole Miss is bound to have a breakout year and win the SEC West. Those pundits are fucking wrong. Sure, they beat Florida last year, but that game was late season Tecmo Super Bowl-esque. Incredulous turnovers and Dave Meggett getting hurt. Pure luck. Then, they waltzed through a watered down SEC West (sans Bama) en route to the Cotton Bowl. Don't buy into the hype

Take the paragraph above and apply it to Oklahoma St. I predict a double-digit UGA win in Stillwater on opening weekend

Speaking of opening weekend - look at these thrilling Big 11 games on tap for next weekend!
  • Eastern Kentucky at Indiana
  • Illinois vs. Missouri (St. Louis)
  • Northern Iowa at Iowa
  • Western Michigan at Michigan
  • Montana State at Michigan State
  • Minnesota at Syracuse
  • Towson at Northwestern
  • Navy at Ohio State
  • Akron at Penn State
  • Toledo at Purdue
  • Northern Illinois at Wisconsin

The Big 11 will make your eyes bleed, but they'll still land tOSU & State Penn in the BCS, where they will once again be sacrificial lambs to teams who play in real conferences

The Big 12 won't play defense, but that will make it fun as hell to watch. Texas should take the conference led by my man-crush/nemesis, Colt McCoy. OU will have trouble with a new offensive line. We'll see how Wahoo Sam Bradford handles pressure. Dude should have left after last year - caution! plummeting draft stock.

I'm predicting great things for Wisconsin, at least great for me. Suspending your top two starting safeties? Check. Lacking a viable QB? Check. A drooling Sammy as head coach? Check. Motor City bowl here we come! Can't wait for that Wofford game!

If you listen, and not even very hard, you can hear the Tim Tebow fellating. It's really fucking annoying. I'm sure he's a good guy, but I can't wait for his ass to graduate so we can talk about something else

Finally, I heart the Song Girls. Fuck you Pope Lope for your proximity to these white-sweatered bimbos. Oregon is a close second. How do they get so tan in Eugene's rainy climes?


You are a Baffoon said...

Here is a little snippet on the Towson vs. Northwestern game upcoming.....Who gives a shit. But anyway the Towson Tigers will cut a rug with the best of them. In fact they are 11 time National Champs D-1 Dance team champs. I wonder if they know the Belt Buckle Dance???? Early prediction Northwestern 45 Towson 12. Towson scores on six safeties due to Northwestern players being distracted by the topless Towson dancers.

Continue reading if you wish to learn more about a boring school in Maryland......

"The Towson Tigers, formerly the Towson College Knights, are the athletics teams of Towson University. All of the major athletic teams compete in the Colonial Athletic Association with 18 Division I athletic teams (11 in women's sports, 7 in men's sports).

Towson is particularly known for its 11 time National Champion Dance Team. Every year the team travels to Daytona Beach, Florida to compete in the National Dance Association College Nationals in D1 Division. The team won their eleventh consecutive title in April 2009."

EMoney said...

D3 - I have no problem with the college football posts provided you continue to crop nice photos along with the post. Although the USC pic isn't showing up....don't know if I'm the only one.

Devil's Threesome said...

Sorry about that, but it's showing up for me. Here's the link, it is safe for work.

And more:



EMoney said...

Do you have any links to pics of the UWM cheerleaders?

EMoney said...

Now, the USC pic is working!

Dude, what decade is that picture from? 80's or 90s? Is that a Polaroid?

PS. 1 word about the Oregon femininas....WOW!

Devil's Threesome said...

You ask for a UWM cheerleader pic and you receive. It was difficult to find. I'm disappointed none have braces or are wearing Lisa Loeb glasses.


EMoney said...

Huh, that's actually better than anything I remember. The lighting must be bad at Turners.

Devil's Threesome said...

Agreed E. They may have looked worse draped around Bruce Pearl.

Softball's Tony Gwynn said...

either than or your judgement may have been impaired because of the "cheap" drinks at Turners.